Can you date if you don’t drive?

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BurzumSpetsnaz asks:

Is this even possible to date in Canada/America if you can’t drive? I’m 21 years old, I don’t have my driver’s license, I have extreme anxiety when it comes to driving. It hasn’t been a problem because I live in a city with public transit that’s functional most of the time. But when it comes to dating, this is something that bothers me because I feel like most girls are expecting the guy to pick them up and it’s something that’s really been holding me back from even talking to girls I’m interested in.


Demetrius says:

You want to know something personal about me? I am 31 years old and I don’t have my driver’s license. I know, I know, qué desgracia, I get it. The thing is, it has never in any way shape or form hindered my ability to date. Like, at all.  Not knowing how to drive for me is sort of like you (probably) not knowing how to do CPR. It might really suck the one time you do need to have that skill when it’s life or death, but so far you’ve probably managed just fine without. So, do I think it’s possible to date in Canada, or its simple cousin country to the south if you can’t, wont, or don’t drive? You can bet your butt I do.

With caveats of course.

First, let’s both acknowledge that we live in cities, and that has some impact on how I answer your question. If you’re asking can you date if you don’t drive, my follow-up questions will always be “Do you live in a city” and “Does your city have a semi-reliable public transportation system, or a semi-reliable and affordable vehicle-for-hire network?” because that’s what really determines if you can date or not. I live in one of the biggest cities in the world, which makes it fairy easy to date. I also have access to one of the most expansive public transportation systems AND one of the largest vehicle-for-hire networks (Yellow Taxis, Borough Taxis, Dollar Vans, Livery Cabs, Ride Share, etc.). I also live in a city whose separate boroughs (excluding Staten Island) have access to a major subway line. Anywhere that I’m going on a date, a major transportation line is within 1 mile of that location. I’m pretty covered when it comes to not having to need a car, and that’s part of the reason I don’t drive. If you didn’t grow up in a city odds are good that you learned to drive either to be able to get away from your house and have a social life or because you wouldn’t be able to go to school if you didn’t drive. You know who isn’t going to learn to drive? The person who could always rely on a cheap transportation option to get from point a to point b. Now, my answer might be a little different depending on your answer.

Let me just say that with enough free time and patience, I don’t think it’d be impossible to date if you didn’t drive if you lived in the suburbs, it would just be way harder than normal. Let’s just assume when you say possible to date you mean possible to date in a way where dates will feel attainable, and not that they required a ton of luck. I think, no I know this based on my experience, that with access to cheap transportation options you can date and never drive, and that will especially hold true if you’re in a major city. The bigger the city, generally speaking, the easier it will be to date without a car. It’s probably easier to date in Toronto than it is to date in Winnipeg if you don’t have a car, but I’m guessing that dating in Fredericton might be a bit harder for a non-driver. You can date without a car in most place, but it really all depends on your access to transportation. As long as you can get from your house to a date relatively easy and inexpensively, you’ll be fine.

Depending on the person, they might expect to be picked up, but I doubt that you’ll lose too many dates because you can’t pick them up. As long as you can pay for a date, and both you and your date can get to and from your respective homes, the date venue, and back again all in one piece, I doubt you’ll have too much trouble dating without a driver’s license.

Good Luck Out There.

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